exploration of inner self by questioning beliefs and assumptions

Middle Finger To Retirement



Neo, like the last relic of a forgotten war. Morpheus, once the herald of truth, now swiping mindlessly on his phone, waiting for a notification that never comes. This isn’t Zion. This isn’t the Matrix. This is worse, this is retirement.

No more machines to fight. No more reality to awaken from. Just the slow, grinding countdown to a number on a calendar: retirement, the grand illusion they fed you as a kid. Work hard, save up, wait patiently, and one day you’ll be free. But freedom never comes. Just aching knees, thinning hair, and a pension check that barely covers the rent.

You were born with a thirst not for water, not for success but for truth. And truth isn’t something you pick up like a souvenir on the road to old age. It’s your essence. You are, but you’ve spent a lifetime without the faintest clue what that means.

The question haunted you from the first breath: Who are you?

And until you face it, until you answer it, no amount of fame, love, pleasure, or money will fill the hollow you carry. Without it, life is nothing more than driftwood, tossed on the tides of circumstance.

The first lesson of retirement? Realizing your purpose was never to live it was to wait. Wait for Fridays. Wait for paychecks. Wait for the weekend. Wait for retirement. And finally, now, wait for the grave.

The world conditioned you like a machine, whispering that life really begins at 60 when you finally "earn" the right to do nothing. But when you get there, the truth hits: the spark’s already gone. The body’s tired, the mind’s cluttered, and the soul... well, you sold that long ago for job security and health insurance.

Like billions before you, wandering through life, you’ve avoided the only question worth asking and you’ll die a stranger to yourself.

Religion lulls you to sleep with bedtime stories: You are a soul, not a body. Heaven awaits. Science flips the script: You are matter, just flesh and bone. The soul is a myth for the weak. Two sides, same coin. Both eager to bury your questions beneath ready-made answers.

From the first time you trusted a parent’s voice, you began stockpiling beliefs and those beliefs slowly strangled your quest. School polished the tombstone with facts and formulas. Science handed you a library card and whispered: Knowledge is power.

Lies. Sophisticated, polished lies

Even now, you hoard knowledge like a miser mistaking dead facts for wisdom. The very first step was crooked, and everything built on it is destined to collapse. You never asked: Who the hell am I? And without that question, every answer you’ve ever swallowed is just recycled noise.

Neo, The One, now believes in lunch breaks. Morpheus, the red-pill prophet, now reduced to offering his pills in the form of Facebook memes. This isn’t a glitch in the Matrix. This is the system working exactly as designed.

Retirement isn’t the end of work it’s the end of meaning. A waiting room with no exit. A soft, silent reboot of the human spirit. And the cruelest part? You spent your entire life chasing it.

Life was never about collecting information. It was about peeling away the masks of beliefs, layer by layer, until nothing remains but raw, undeniable being. You can’t “understand” yourself from the outside. You have to be.

The moment you dissolve your false personality your borrowed identity the world dissolves with it. What remains is just existence, pure and total. And for that, you need courage. Real courage. The guts to stand naked before yourself, stripped of borrowed ideas, second-hand beliefs, and holy books.

The dream of retirement happiness is a lie, recycled junk, dressed up as knowledge. By the time you hit your 60s, your questions, if you even have them, are just hand-me-down echoes. Parroted phrases. Noise in your head.

The world sold you the greatest scam of all: the illusion that retirement equals freedom. But the truth is, your mind is a graveyard, cluttered with thoughts. You are a prisoner of words, old doctrines, dogmas  so tangled up, you’ve long forgotten the sky.

Retirement parks you among the other suited zombies, dressed-up corpses, walking encyclopedias with no soul. Old age isn’t liberation. It’s a heavy chain. A gilded cage of noise you were trained to love. And the tragedy? You mistook it for wisdom.

Are you afraid?

You should be.


You followed the script. You worked hard. You saved diligently. You skipped the vacations, ignored the dance classes, shelved your dreams and hobbies. You sacrificed now for later because everyone said that “later” was where freedom lived.

And now? You're 60-something. Retired. Or almost. And you're wondering why it all feels like empty bullshit.

Retirement was never designed to be a reward. It was a human resources strategy a way to offload aging workers without a riot. The age of 65 was picked because most people are already dead by 62. Think about that for a second.

But the system knew you wouldn’t dig too deep. So they wrapped it in gold. “Work hard now, enjoy later,” they said. “Sacrifice for the future,” and they nodded wisely.

And you believed them. We all did. An now we’re here. Our knees hurt. We forget why we walked into the room. And that beach house on the retirement add? It's a rental. On Airbnb. For a week. In January.

Retirement sounded like freedom, but it feels a little like exile. You spent decades building someone else’s dream while yours quietly died. And now that you’re “free”? You don’t even remember what you wanted. 

Here’s a brutal little fact no one wants to say out loud: You need purpose. Not golf. Not endless cruises. Not reorganizing your sock drawer 14 times a month.

You weren’t just a job title. But you were taught to believe you were. So now, when that title’s gone, when no one needs you to log on, report in, or show up, you feel like you’re disappearing. It’s not just sad. You didn’t just lose a job. You lost identity, routine, recognition, community and maybe your sense of mattering.

And they call this “the golden years”? But it is more like bronzed bullshit. The World Has Changed. The Retirement Story Hasn't. The retirement narrative was built for a world where one job lasted a lifetime. That job paid you enough to live, save, and retire. You got a pension, a handshake, and a gold watch. That world? Dead. Buried. Decomposed.

Now we’ve got crippling healthcare costs. Investment portfolios that collapse faster than your lower back. And “freedom” that costs more than most can afford. You're expected to live 20-30 years after retirement... but with what? Savings? It’s a glorified roulette table. Social Security? Fingers crossed it’s still there. Pensions? LOL. 

You weren’t promised a future. You were sold one. A cleverly packaged illusion that let companies squeeze every drop of labor from you while dangling a someday carrot in front of your nose. “Keep going.”, “Be responsible.”, “Wait just a little longer.” Until... you can’t anymore. 

You don’t know how to live because you were too busy waiting. So What Now? You could keep waiting, play cards. Watch daytime TV. Wait to die quietly. Or you could finally, finally, start doing the things you postponed for a lifetime.


No, this isn’t about quitting life this is about reclaiming your curiosity, your creativity, your presence. This is about choosing now instead of chasing someday. Write the book. Volunteer. Take the painting class. Start the podcast. Hug your kids longer. Start the damn garden. 

You don’t need a job title to matter. You need something that makes you feel alive. You’re not too old. You’re not too late. You’re not done. This next chapter? Make it yours. Unapologetically, unreasonably, relentlessly yours. 

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